March and Love

Errrr, mcm geli pulak tajuk. Haha. Tapi bagi aku bulan March macam bulan yang penuh kasih sayang sebab ramai orang kawen time ni. Boleh terima ke alasan ni? Haha. Whatever. Tapi betul la. Abang aku pun kawen bulan March. Pastu yang latest, eh tak jadi lagi. Yang latest-bakal kawen ialah Din. Partner sama umur, sama shift, sama faham joke, sama2 usha orang lalu lalang depan cube kitorg, sama2 orang Perak and etc. Tapi dia terlebih ramah dengan gila dari aku. Haha. Kenduri dia 30 March uols. Terharu iols. Tapi tak sure boleh pegi ke idokkk. Apa2 pun, tahniah Din. Dalam seminggu before dia nak cuti kawen tu, macam happy terlebih pulak budak ni. Hyperactive semacam. Gembira betul dia. Masa last day haritu lagi la. Asyik keje nak nyembang and mengarut je, and sape mangsa kena layan? Aku ler, sape lagi. Udahnye tempat aku sebelah dia je. Nak toleh belakang, Som tak datang. Dia attack orang sebelah kanan dia ni la T_T Tapi, rasa mcm bertuah sungguh tunang dia. Memang nampak sgt kat mata dia yang dia tengah bahagia and in love. Time dia sembang dgn tunang dia on the phone pun, dengar mcm sweet sangat. Sorry Din, tercuri dengar. Sape suruh ko duduk tak sampai sedepa dari aku >.< Aku rasa, that is the sweetest moment ever. Aku ni jarang nak cakap sesuatu benda tu sweet. Kalau setakat tgk Aaron Aziz dalam Ombak Rindu ke, Adam dan Hawa ke, urghh. Tolong. Tak rasa langsung sweet tu. Anyway, aku tak tengok pun cerita2 tu. Saja bagi contoh. Cerita2 cheesy mcm tu aku tak layan. Tolong la. Tapi, si Din punya situasi memang sweet betul. Style kena tgk sendiri, pastu rasa sweet tu sampai ke hati sampai kita pun tersenyum sendiri. Ini la first time aku tengok sinar cahaya cinta kat lelaki. Apsal time tulis ayat tu aku mcm terbayang situasi dalam cerita Hanakimi. Ala, yang laki sorg tu boleh tengok aura kat orang lain. Laki tu dah la berlakon dalam cite Kamen Rider Kabuto. Sama la jugak dengan Nanba senpai tu. Ok, melalut kamen rider pulak dahhhh. Haha. So,analoginya, aku boleh nampak aura pink kat sekitar Din. Wohooo.

Akhir kata, tahniah Din sebab berjaya membawa hubungan ko ke level yang lebih diberkati Allah SWT. Dengar cite bercinta dari zaman skola uols. Hihi. Tapi cmni ah, kawen awal sgt. Nanti mesti orang2 kat office attack aku pulak. Nasib badan T_T

International Women's Day

Jumaat hari tu hari wanita sedunia. I dont care. Because last three days was the worst day of my life.
I've never thought that people will simply judge me solely based on my project's progress. Yes, i'm talking about my work here.
I dont know what else should i do. They asked me to do some of the A's (bukan nama sebenar) task because she is busy with the so-called big issue on her process. Ok, i'm willing to help her. After all, i was the ex-owner of that process. I've been doing all those stuff that are not related to my current process just for the sake of helping her. And somehow, i neglected my own project. It was on hold for a while. I must admit that this is my own mistake. I cant focus on that project. I just cant. You know the feeling of handling two totally different type of process and at the same time people keep pushing you to hit the dateline. It's like you have to cut your brain into two sections, so that they can work and think individually. I dont expect you to understand. I know that you dont even care. Just let me have some space to let all those feelings out of my chest. Because they are eating me up :'(

And last Thursday, they were questioning about my effectiveness. They were wondering why my project has been slowing down lately. What should i say? I have try my best to fulfill their request. They dont even care about the works i've done for A that have been occupied me. They dont care about all those things that i've done previously. I should just say no when they were asking for my help. I should just say no when they keep transferring me to different process ownership. I should say "Please, leave me alone. I was just 5 months old with this new process, and you expect me to master all? The last owner was given 1 week to pass down everything to me. I was struggling to understand this process by myself. I'm learning everything by myself. Do you even care about that?" But again, they are the bosses. I am just the slave to the company. What else can i do.

I just hope that there is someone,somewhere that didnt judge people by eyes, instead he/she judge people by heart and brain. I am sick with people taking me for granted. I am sick of everything. If appreciating me is something too much to ask for, then just leave me alone.